my husband won't let me put the heating on
Kristina Davis

“My husband won’t let me put the heating on” This exact complaint is quite common in a home among married couples.

Having to share a central heating system with someone can be a real problem. And no, it does not get better even though that person is your husband or loved one.

In this article, we discuss good steps you could possibly take when your husband won’t let you turn on the heater. 

So do ensure you read on till the end.

There are several reasons why your husband might be finding it difficult to turn on the heating in your home. One could be the high cost of energy bills to keep the heating on. Personal preference could be another reason.

Why My Husband Won’t Turn On The Heater 

why do husband won't let me put the heating on

Sharing a central heating system with someone can be a bit painful.

This is because of preference as to what particular temperature setting might be different for both parties. It is even worse if the two parties involved are married couples.

If proper care is not taken, something as simple as the heating systems can lead to very painful arguments.

And we do not want that!

With that being said, if you do have issues concerning heating issues with your partner, it is always a great idea to try to understand where they are coming from. 

Why won’t your husband let you turn the heater on?

Well, here are some reasons why your partner isn’t letting you turn on the central heating system. 

Tip: Have a conversation with your husband as to what could be his reasons for not letting you turn the heater on. 

Reason #1: Financial Cost Of Heating The Home Might Be Expensive 

financial cost of heating expensive

One of the joys of marriage is that you get to share a common problem, and this also applies to heating and cooling bills. 

Depending on a few factors, you could end up with a very crazily expensive heating bill at the end of the month, if you aren’t too careful. 

Some of these factors would include;


The colder your climate is, the more heat you would require to stay warm, thus the more energy you consume which leads to a high energy bill.

Size Of Your Home

Your home size can also affect energy bills, especially with regard to heating. Larger homes would require more heating and thus a higher bill. 

Fuel Cost

a fuel cost

Heating systems as you already know run on fuel like oil or natural gas. The longer you leave your heater on, the more fuel you consume. 

Type Of Fuel

The type of fuel also matters. Homes that make use of oil-powered or electric-powered heating systems, tend to have a higher energy bill. 

All in all, it can be quite expensive to run the central heating system and for your husband, this might be a huge reason why he is so bent on leaving the heater off. 

Tip: You can get a programmable thermostat installed to help you save a lot on heating bills. 

Reason #2: Concerns About The Environment

concerns in the environment

If you are married to a green thumb who cares a lot about the environment, chances are that he could be denying you access to the heater because of the environment. 

You might not know this but using a heating system does have a negative impact on the overall environment.

✅ For one, the use of oil-based heating systems does release some harmful gasses into the atmosphere. 

Heating systems that are powered by wood burning can also pose harmful threats to the environment.

This presents your husband with some genuine reasons as to why the heating system could be bad. 

Reason #3: Concerns About His Health

Being exposed to long hours of cold can be harmful to your health, so it is generally more beneficial to have a good heating system installed.

However, there are cases where a heating system can have negative health issues for your family, and it is all dependent on the type of heating system. 

Heating systems that you run on oil can cause a terrible build-up of carbon monoxide if not properly maintained.

They can also lead to the build-up of other allergens and dust, which could be very bad for your health. 

Try keeping your heating system properly cleaned to avoid these harmful toxins from building up in your homes and causing some serious health conditions to your family.

Tip: You can try installing a carbon monoxide detector in your home to let you know if your home is approaching dangerous levels.

Reason #4: Personal Preference 

his personal preference

Sometimes, the reason as to why your husband isn’t letting you turn on the heater might also be something very simple as him preferring a cooler temperature in the home. 

If this is the case, then you might need to work out a possible solution to your individual temperature differences.

After finding out what might be the possible reason for your husband’s decision to leave the central heating off, the next step would be figuring out how to tackle such a problem.   

What To Do When My Husband Won’t Let Me Put The Heating On

Now that you are sure of what could likely be influencing your husband’s decision to leave the heater off, what are the possible steps you could take to solve this problem?

Well, here are a few;


In most cases, problems like these could be solved with effective communication. 

Have a one-on-one sit down with your husband and have him explain his reasons for why he won’t let you turn on the heater.  

some communication

One key way to effective communication is through attentive and active listening.

Try to properly listen to your husband’s reasons as to why he prefers the cool temperature.

You could practice some empathy or try to understand where he is coming from.

If you do feel his reasons are not enough, then the next point would certainly come in handy in solving this problem.

Tip: When communicating, try to be calm and understanding of your husband’s reasons for turning the heating system off.

Check The Building’s Rules

Some buildings in the United States have laid down rules on how heating and cooling should be managed in a shared space.

Do a thorough check on the rules of the building to figure out if there is a walkaround that you can explore.

Try To Reach A Compromise

Once you fully have a clear understanding as to why your husband won’t let you put on the heater (which can only be done through effective communication), the next step would be to attempt to reach a compromise.

To reach a compromise, would mean providing acceptable solutions to the heating problem.

try reach a compromise

If your husband’s reasons are related to health, then an effective compromise would be taking out time to properly clean and maintain the heating system.

If the problems are related to financial expenses, then you can consider installing better insulation units indoors to help keep the room properly insulated.

Consider installing good energy-saving windows and doors.

Another effective compromise you can make is to review the overall financial budget and make cutdowns to allow for more heating to the house.

Learn to prioritize your wants and needs, especially with regard to your monthly budget or plans.  

You can consider installing a heating unit that is powered by natural gas as they are less expensive to maintain and are less harmful to the environment. 

Effective compromises are quite important for issues like this.

– Seek Help

seek some help

If after many attempts at compromise and effective communication, the problem still persists, then you can consider seeking help.

You can either speak with a mediator, like a landlord, or consider going to therapy.

✅ Therapy is much advice for dealing with issues between married partners. 

Take your husband to therapy sessions that could help with tackling these issues. Sometimes the problem might be a lot deeper than he might be letting out. 

This is why a trained professional could help by offering possible solutions that might put both partners at ease.

Consider A Lifestyle Change

considering lifestyle change

If all things fail, then you might consider a lifestyle change that could help you adjust to the cold climate.

You can consider wearing thicker clothes indoors that could help shield your body from the effects of the excess cold. 

You can also consider taking in hot beverages like tea and cocoa to help you deal with the excess cold.

Although this might not be the best solution, it can be used as a temporary solution till the main problems regarding the heating systems are solved.

Read Next: How Far Should Furniture Be From Baseboard Heaters?

Final Thoughts

By following some of the steps and methods listed in the article above, you should be able to solve the problems and never have the complaints of “My husband won’t let me put the heating on” again.

Problems with the central heating system are actually more common for married couples than you would imagine.

If not handled properly, they can sometimes put a serious strain on the marriage.

This is why it is highly important that you make out active steps toward dealing with the issue.